The University of California - Santa Cruz

Date: Apr 23 2003
Major: Other (This Major's Salary over time)
Top Ten Reasons why UCSC and Santa Cruz in General SUCKS!!!

1. Mall rats from Los Angeles that think they are hippies.

1 and a 1/2.. !!God damm Hippies all over Santa Cruz!!

2. Traffic (People here drive like they are all stoned hippies).. All roads lead in concentric circles.. Around and around.. as if they were engineered by a bunch of stoned hippies.

3. Over Priced.. Hey if I wanted to pay up the butt I would have moved to Aspen.. At least the people there would have smelled better when you are waiting in the only open lane at the only big food store in town. Hippies don't work for the store cause um it is a corporate store.

4. Hypocrisy.. Smog-spouting VW busses with 20 "Save the Planet" bumper stickers. Organic, dreadlocked, anti-corporate "hippies" buying $200 t-shirts at one of the downtown shops. Proselytizing about how car companies have conspired with oil companies to keep people from using public transportation (No blood for oil!)… When they and everyone they associate with drive the most expensive, gas-guzzling vehicles on the market.

5. UCSC Classes.. There aren't any!! Well, no, they have classes for freshman and sophomores.. Pretty much like anything you could get for a lot less money at any Junior College on the planet. If you are a junior or a senior, you will most likely get stuck in a class that is comparable to underwater BB stacking, or something even less remotely major related to why you came here in the first place.

6. Having to be taught by UCSC Professors who hate their field. They tell you in your last year of study that your major is dead, and the last four previous students they taught were working at the Starbucks they visited. Oh and they had master's degrees even!!

Pity, you should have chosen economics. They are offering a degree in Business Administration this year! You should have majored in that instead my fine students..

Learn how to make a good latte before you graduate from here.. Make sure you buy yourself a Espresso Machine with those textbooks!

7. Volvos.. Everyone who loves SC has one. If it is a gas-guzzling white diesel that is as old as your are, and you have found yourself behind it, THEN you definitely are in Santa Cruz waiting 30 minutes to go two blocks.

8. Can we say stupid pedestrians?!? How many people do you know walk straight into the street without looking both ways? Most 4 year olds know this stuff. Yet, if one of these crazy hippies sees you throwing away your "right of way" and stopping so traffic can continue, you will be lectured on your "rights" as a pedestrian. My right isn't worth a broken neck! Get real!

9. The ever-present cloud of pot smoke that permeates the town. As I am sure you have experienced yourself, homeless people I have dealt with in other places usually ask you for a hand-out, instead in Santa Cruz they ask you if you would like to buy some “bud”. Homeless dope pushers whose upscale client includes the wannabe suburbanite hippies of UCSC. They have a stash of pot greater than a drug king pin in Costa Rica. And when they aren't busy smoking up a storm they are turning it into wallets and shoes and selling them for as much as a pair of good sneakers. Yeah, like I am going to jump like Shaq O'neal out of the way of a moving car while I am enforcing my "right of way" while crossing the street, buddy!

10. Driving 40 minutes away to the next local city that has convenience stores, and shopping malls in order to by the normal essentials of life. Things like toilet paper sells for three times as much in Santa Cruz then anywhere else outside city limits.

DON'T COME HERE IF YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR EDUCATION!!!