College, oh where oh where to begin?
start out with the positive aspect of the school. Vermont
state is absolutely stunning. If you can get past the
smell of cow heaps, or even the occasional on-campus game
of “cow patty bingo,” Vermont is otherwise charming. The buildings
and facilities are top notch. Dorm rooms are very spacious
and kept up to date. The food is diverse and
delicious, and I understand that the school has a newly
constructed dining hall that rivals it's other modern hall. There
is always something fun to do on campus, and the
student activities board is, indeed, highly active. While I attended
Middlebury, I was under the impression that the staff and
the student activity board were genuinely interested in “how much
fun” I was having, which is, admittedly, a nice feeling.
If you are a ski freak then you'll be glad
to know that Middlebury owns it's own skiing facility, the
Snow Bowl. I was never much into skiing during my
time there but Middlebury offers many classes to learn. You
can even apply skiing or snowboarding to your required physical
education credit. Hmm what have I left out? The professors
are fantastic. They are the “come by and chat” sort.
In fact, the staff and the people of Vermont tend
to be kind, sprightly, generous people.
The student body. Could such a charming and elite college
set in idyllic Vermont assemble a more grotesque group of
heathens? I'd estimate about 1% of these creatures are Vermonters,
and it SHOWS. In fact, everything SHOWS. I've never seen
such a group of animals TRY so desperately to seem
wealthier than the next person. Like the strings in a
“Peter Pan” play, these intellectually dummel maggots soar about gloating
over money and position, whilst desperately grasping the air above
them for some semblance of social legitimacy. Readers if you
thought Princeton eating clubs were pretentious, wait until you witness
the bourgeouise hypocrisy of Middlebury College! Are there or are
there not 64% of students at this tiny institution on
financial aid? The figure might have changed since my time
at Middlebury, but I've never seen such class panic in
my life. And believe me, I have travelled. And oh
yes, the school is racist on a particular level. I
dare to say that this is the one high stratum
the Middlebury student body en masse reaches, to the level
of a Nazi prison guard standing alert in a tower.
I really suggest that President Lebowitz, well, WAKES UP, and
take a look at the CAMPus over which he is
presiding. I do not subscribe to racist or anti-Semitic
thinking (or lack thereof) but can I say CRIKEY?! I've
seen minority students physically threatened and reduced to tears. All
of this occurs in PUBLIC, readers.
Such pretty snow,
oh but such nasty people.
Oh and yes, the
practical application of a Middlebury education in the career world.
Well is it practical? Errm, no, sorry. Reading 30
page packets and droning on and on about such dated
material in a surprisingly illiterate classroom will not prepare you
for the competetive and globalized world out there. No tiny
village in Vermont will prepare you for that, not even
the so-called “impressive” Middlebury language schools abroad will prepare you.
Students who study abroad through Middlebury speak english any chance
they get. It's a dirty little secret. There is no
immersion, and this is quite a problem if you consider
that Middlebury's draw is for it's foreign language program. Whether
you learn the language at this pompous, arrogant (without the
goods to back it up) wintery school, or at Kalamazoo
State College, it really makes no difference.
mention that the school's one crowning literary achievement is the
woman who wrote “The Vagina Monologues” (a campus favorite)? I'd
venture to say that her protagonist has far more interesting
subjects to discuss than any of the mingers at Mingerbury
Last subject yet certainly not the least of
concern, is the weather, that dreadful weather.
Could Middlebury get
any colder? Granted you know that Vermont is a cold
state. In the winter months (staring around October) the snow
frosted campus is actually quite stunning. But readers imagine having
to live in Antarctica for your entire scholastic duration. Yes
it's very quaint and charming, but you may find your
dorm equally frosty, the showers out of hot water, and
sheets of ice welcoming you on your morning soujourn to
class. You'll be covered from head to toe in insulated
fabrics, hardly ideal for pretty girls out there. But ARE
there pretty girls at Middlebury? It's a catty assertion, yes,
but I'm being perfectly frank here. The students APPEAR the
way they act, male and female. Oh and they smell
awful. I felt like I was stranded in a frozen
So all in all, Middlebury, Vermont is a
nice place to visit, but a horrid place to study.