The University of Alabama - Birmingham

Date: Nov 10 2015
Major: Journalism (This Major's Salary over time)
I came to this school because I thought I was going to be a doctor and UAB pretty much paid for me to be here. So money was not a factor. If you are paying to go here, I'm so sorry. You're not getting your money's worth. And here's a systematic breakdown:

Living on campus - I have friends that go to schools in Ohio and California, Atlanta or NYC, literally anywhere and everywhere else, and none of them have stricter housing policies than we do. The check-in policy is ridiculous and redundant: you must check-in a person you are bringing to the dorm, even if they are a UAB student and/or lives ON CAMPUS. Then, you are not allowed any "alcoholic paraphernalia", a term the stuck-up RAs like to interpret verrrrrrry loosely. Asbestos was found in Denman Hall last year. Another hall isn't called "nasty Rasty" for no reason. You're forced to buy meal plans / Dining Dollars / whatever the fuck it's called they change it every year, which is tyrannical because Sodexo food is disgusting. Like prison-food-disgusting. Which hmmm, I do believe Sodexo does that too…..

Academics - I decided not to go to medical school because the way all pre-med / medical students looked all the time was not enticing. Don't come here if you want to major in the liberal arts or humanities, or even engineering, unless it's BME. All this school cares about are its crown jewel sciences. Like, yes, you'll cure diabetes, we get it, but what will you do for your local Broadcasting major? If it's not related to science, you can bet the resources for it are going to be shitty. Look at Hulsey. What a joke. But say you do want to go into the sciences? The professors, especially the Biology ones, will try to tear you down at every turn. It's truly amazing. At least the research opportunities are pretty great, but is that a surprise? Would you expect and accept anything less?

Athletics - it took the school president taking away football to make people care about it, even though we don't have a football stadium. Enough said.

Arts - I mean they tore down a very necessary parking lot to build an unnecessary art museum, but since I complained about the school not doing enough for anything other than the sciences a paragraph ago, I can't really talk.

Greek Life / Parties- a bigger joke than how long it's taking them to build the new student center. Greek life is almost insignificant here, but also significant in that they're the only ones that host parties with free alcohol (Thanks double X chromosomes!). GDI parties are pretty nonexistent, but Greek life ones aren't better. Also, you almost always have to find a DD because UAB doesn't recognize official frat houses. UAB will recognize the frats, and then pretend they don't exist. The Greeks always shit talk each other, especially on YikYak, which is amusing because it's like watching turds fight over which one is the shiniest, when at the end of the day…they're all turds.

Student life - When you're not at each other's throats over Goldwater, it's okay I guess. The people are, for the most part, really open-minded and accepting. More so then Auburn or Alabama, which is not hard, but at this school you'll take anything you can get.

Parking - If you live off-campus, or if you live on-campus and you leave in the middle of a weekday, you will see a simulation of hell: finding a spot to park in.

Basically, it's mediocre at best, 7th ring of hell at its worst. If you visit other school campuses, from Alabama to WASHU to Auburn to UCLA while you attend school at UAB, you will spend the rest of your college years wondering what you're missing out on in your college life by coming here.