Mark a survey and Inform Staff

Peer Review:

Statistical Analyzer: ,BLANK_SURVEY_NODATA

If you want to walk the interminable distances to your different classes blinded by the glaring sun because of the paucity of trees on campus, if you want a bleak campus with the shabbiness of a big city and the annoying nosiness and inescapability of a small town (the kind you were trying to escape by going to college), if you want diverse peers (read: lots of blacks, Asians, Indians, and Muslims who rarely meaningfully interact with each other); if you want to go for days without AC in >90 degree heat in your stuffed jail cell of a dorm room; if the vapidity and forced pedantic liberalism of public high school makes you nostalgic instead of homicidal; if you are are majoring in Russian or Japanese and don't mind risking having only ONE Japanese or Russian professor who was hired for being the only Japanese/ Russian person in the area; if you have authoritarian/ fascistic tendencies and therefore don't mind mindlessly, asininely screaming "GOOOOOO UMBC, GOOOOO RETREIEVERS" like an insane person until you need a hearing aid; if you don't mind your precious time being spent playing compulsory games such as "pass the plastic dolphin and talk about something that made you smile this summer," (MANY TIMES); if you don't mind American pop music being played at a stentorian volume right outside your dorm, at in the cafeteria, in almost every "event" (because (says an aspiring cosmopolitan college) everyone likes American pop music, right?); if you don't mind eating the same kind of American food every day; if you don't mind being told to smile when you are exhausted, even though YOU'RE paying for this all, for heaven's sake, then I HIGHLY RECOMMEND UMBC.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RETRIEVERS!!!!!!!! (…and don't come back)